We had another snow storm yesterday. I LOVE the snow. I find myself baffled though at the fact that we live in the state of Maine, are known to get some of the craziest, quirkiest weather; and people STILL drive TERRIBLE in the snow.
My normal 15-20 min drive home yesterday was an hour long. YIKES!!
The kids and I did also have to go the entire night with no TV-I know, imagine that!?!
Hopefully the satellite is in working order when I get home today. (FINGERS CROSSED)
Thursday, February 28, 2013
Wednesday, February 27, 2013
The mind of a 7 year old...
We had friends over last night, by "we" the kids and I. Our neighbors, conveniently each of our best friends, came over to play after school and eat dinner.
The mom-JE, and her 2 boys E and Ry are both the same age as my boys, but 3 months older.
E is 7. He and B-man help each other out a lot, because they are both "different". Having each other has helped them both through some tough times/transitions at school.
B-man doesn't know how to make friends partly because of his AS, and is very socially awkward. Having E living next door to us, makes it easy for them to be friends, they are more like siblings. They fight like siblings, but can always count on each other.
I have known E since he was 2 years old. For as long as I can remember, he has always wanted to play "girl" games, or chooses "girl" toys. I know initially we (his mom and I, and his family) had thought this was just a passing phase and maybe he just needed some male involvement or influence to be swayed to more gender correct likings.
Now almost 6 years later, he is still having the same preference when it comes to toys and clothes, and games he chooses to partake in. Now, though, he has become so accustomed to it, that he enjoys it. He knows that this is what he wants, and has FINALLY been able to find the words to explain and express to all the loving adults in his world, that he is not meant to be a boy. He is a girl, with a boys body.
Honestly, if someone said to me that this was happening to someone they knew, I would probably laugh and assume that the parents are doing something wrong. But I have to say, I have watched this little boy struggle with who he is for 6 years.
He tries to follow the norm, because he has a brother and 2 best buds-also boys that its only natural to want to fit in with, and because most importantly, he -as a 7 year old boy-has to consider how many children at school will make fun of him, or tease him for his choices.
Last night, while JE and I were hoping to catch up on gossip while the kids played together, we spent it COMPLETELY differently. E sat crying about how he doesn't want to pretend to be a boy anymore, he cant hold in his feelings and he wants his hair to grow so people will know he is a girl. And why cant he have been born a girl, and what will they do to his boy parts since he doesn't want them.
I could not wrap my head around it. I am sitting there watching his mother in tears trying to comfort her child, and her child completely out of control and SO SAD because he is a boy and not a girl.
All I wanted to do was comfort him because he is like my own child. There was nothing I could do or say to help him feel better.
He wanted to get up this morning, and put on one of his dresses and cute shoes and go to school as a girl, which is what he wants to do every morning, but he doesn't understand the fear his mother has in him doing this. The conflict and heart ache he will be faced with when he walks into his classroom dressed as he wants to be dressed. I cant imagine being faced with that choice as a parent.
We all want to teach our children to be kind and caring no matter what someone looks like, or how they act. We pride ourselves in the way we raise our children, and hope that they continue to make us proud even when we cant be right there to ensure they are. But society is what it is. I am thankful that my children have also watched Es story unfold and can be aware that this is real life and something that people struggle with and I can only hope that they continue to support and encourage him outside of our home just as they do inside our house and yards when I am standing nearby.
I feel as though today is a turning point for E, he got a lot of his feelings out last night. His mom has a lot to take in and deal with, but I know after watching her child suffer like he did explaining how he feels, she will do this and she will do the best she can to make sure he is and feels supported 100%.
The mom-JE, and her 2 boys E and Ry are both the same age as my boys, but 3 months older.
E is 7. He and B-man help each other out a lot, because they are both "different". Having each other has helped them both through some tough times/transitions at school.
B-man doesn't know how to make friends partly because of his AS, and is very socially awkward. Having E living next door to us, makes it easy for them to be friends, they are more like siblings. They fight like siblings, but can always count on each other.
I have known E since he was 2 years old. For as long as I can remember, he has always wanted to play "girl" games, or chooses "girl" toys. I know initially we (his mom and I, and his family) had thought this was just a passing phase and maybe he just needed some male involvement or influence to be swayed to more gender correct likings.
Now almost 6 years later, he is still having the same preference when it comes to toys and clothes, and games he chooses to partake in. Now, though, he has become so accustomed to it, that he enjoys it. He knows that this is what he wants, and has FINALLY been able to find the words to explain and express to all the loving adults in his world, that he is not meant to be a boy. He is a girl, with a boys body.
Honestly, if someone said to me that this was happening to someone they knew, I would probably laugh and assume that the parents are doing something wrong. But I have to say, I have watched this little boy struggle with who he is for 6 years.
He tries to follow the norm, because he has a brother and 2 best buds-also boys that its only natural to want to fit in with, and because most importantly, he -as a 7 year old boy-has to consider how many children at school will make fun of him, or tease him for his choices.
Last night, while JE and I were hoping to catch up on gossip while the kids played together, we spent it COMPLETELY differently. E sat crying about how he doesn't want to pretend to be a boy anymore, he cant hold in his feelings and he wants his hair to grow so people will know he is a girl. And why cant he have been born a girl, and what will they do to his boy parts since he doesn't want them.
I could not wrap my head around it. I am sitting there watching his mother in tears trying to comfort her child, and her child completely out of control and SO SAD because he is a boy and not a girl.
All I wanted to do was comfort him because he is like my own child. There was nothing I could do or say to help him feel better.
He wanted to get up this morning, and put on one of his dresses and cute shoes and go to school as a girl, which is what he wants to do every morning, but he doesn't understand the fear his mother has in him doing this. The conflict and heart ache he will be faced with when he walks into his classroom dressed as he wants to be dressed. I cant imagine being faced with that choice as a parent.
We all want to teach our children to be kind and caring no matter what someone looks like, or how they act. We pride ourselves in the way we raise our children, and hope that they continue to make us proud even when we cant be right there to ensure they are. But society is what it is. I am thankful that my children have also watched Es story unfold and can be aware that this is real life and something that people struggle with and I can only hope that they continue to support and encourage him outside of our home just as they do inside our house and yards when I am standing nearby.
I feel as though today is a turning point for E, he got a lot of his feelings out last night. His mom has a lot to take in and deal with, but I know after watching her child suffer like he did explaining how he feels, she will do this and she will do the best she can to make sure he is and feels supported 100%.
Tuesday, February 26, 2013
Home Depot
I think previously I had mentioned that our house has several little projects going on and none seem to be moving anywhere. I did make an effort to tackle most of those projects in question, but our house has continued to fail. Over the past 6 months or so it has literally been one thing after another.
My initial thought is-lets leave. Lets go buy a new house so we don't have to deal with all this old failing junk in our house and we can buy ourselves a few years of maintenance free living. I know this is not realistic, in my mind I could rationalize still that it is and just to be me.. I may do that on occasion. However, I know that currently this is not an option for us.
We will be living in this house for at least a few more years.
So, with that statement swallowed.... or gulped, I delve into the home improvement mode.. and start going room by room repairing what we need to repair.
Our 1st floor bathroom was without a toilet for a few months, last weekend, we replaced the toilet. Now here lies my control issue.. who can bear to look at a bathroom with a sparkly white toilet and a dated blue and gold vanity with lights that match the 70s era look??? Ya, not me. NOT AT ALL. My husband-yes.. We need to rip out the sink and replace the floor just so my mind can rest in regards to the fashion faux-pau taking place in my bathroom.
Our 2nd floor shower in not in use currently because it has been dripping into our kitchen-behind a couple cabinets. This is like the wholly grail of home owner issues to me. Water = mold, which leads to all sorts of menacing thoughts running through my brain. This will be a bigger project, likely involving our insurance and some experts to assist with the work. I envision a HUGE MESS... I try not to think about it too much.
Needless to say, the local Home Depot is our friend. The employees now recognize me and chat w the kids when we enter.. its comforting, but very sad.. ha ha..
My initial thought is-lets leave. Lets go buy a new house so we don't have to deal with all this old failing junk in our house and we can buy ourselves a few years of maintenance free living. I know this is not realistic, in my mind I could rationalize still that it is and just to be me.. I may do that on occasion. However, I know that currently this is not an option for us.
We will be living in this house for at least a few more years.
So, with that statement swallowed.... or gulped, I delve into the home improvement mode.. and start going room by room repairing what we need to repair.
Our 1st floor bathroom was without a toilet for a few months, last weekend, we replaced the toilet. Now here lies my control issue.. who can bear to look at a bathroom with a sparkly white toilet and a dated blue and gold vanity with lights that match the 70s era look??? Ya, not me. NOT AT ALL. My husband-yes.. We need to rip out the sink and replace the floor just so my mind can rest in regards to the fashion faux-pau taking place in my bathroom.
Our 2nd floor shower in not in use currently because it has been dripping into our kitchen-behind a couple cabinets. This is like the wholly grail of home owner issues to me. Water = mold, which leads to all sorts of menacing thoughts running through my brain. This will be a bigger project, likely involving our insurance and some experts to assist with the work. I envision a HUGE MESS... I try not to think about it too much.
Needless to say, the local Home Depot is our friend. The employees now recognize me and chat w the kids when we enter.. its comforting, but very sad.. ha ha..
Monday, February 25, 2013
Commitment
Ok, here goes post #2 for this round of which I have promised to focus on blogging.
Lets catch up a bit, shall we???
Still me and the 3 boys.. K-spouse, B-man-now 7, and AJ-now 6.
K is still at work a lot, he does find more time to do fun things with the kids, and they enjoy every chance they get to do something cool with dad.
B-man, now in 2nd grade. We spent a lot of last year going through testing and battling it out with his 1st grade teacher and the school. This proved to be a lot of wasted time, but this year has allowed the comfort of knowing it was all worth it. B-man was diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome (AS) last May, which has now become a diagnosis of Pervasive Development Disorder (PDD) on the Autism Spectrum.
Im not gonna lie-I liked the AS diagnosis much better that calling him Autistic. Im not biased to one or the other, but I just feel like there is less of an explanation needed for saying he has AS, versus my son is Autistic. Most peoples perception of an autistic child is very unrealistic, and not anything fitting to my child. And, as we all know-the spectrum is wide and personally in some ways-we all fit into it. But Im not a doctor, so Ill go with the rationale they used to remove a diagnosis from medical dictionaries and smush it all into one.
B-man attends weekly counseling sessions and weekly speech therapy session. He is extremely advanced in Math and Science-mainly because they are black and white and based on fact. He gets a little blurry on anything that is slightly "gray". we are currently working on helping him make friends at school, which is very challenging.
AJ, is now in kindergarten. He LOVES School, and school LOVES him. He is a mini-me, and known as quite the social butterfly at school. He is very devious, but smiles and tilts his head and all is forgotten. Its a very dangerous quality. With him growing up and now starting school we are now seeing what we missed out on with B-man. Things we thought were fairly normal for a Kindergartener or 1st grader-not so much.. Its like having a child in school has a whole new meaning for me.
I spend a lot of time feeling guilty that B-man is missing out on such fun childhood things, but then realize that he is enjoying childhood in his own way and loving every minute of it.
Keeping both kids happy and content in their own worlds is very tiresome, but since thats all I know, I will keep at it.
Until next time..
Lets catch up a bit, shall we???
Still me and the 3 boys.. K-spouse, B-man-now 7, and AJ-now 6.
K is still at work a lot, he does find more time to do fun things with the kids, and they enjoy every chance they get to do something cool with dad.
B-man, now in 2nd grade. We spent a lot of last year going through testing and battling it out with his 1st grade teacher and the school. This proved to be a lot of wasted time, but this year has allowed the comfort of knowing it was all worth it. B-man was diagnosed with Aspergers syndrome (AS) last May, which has now become a diagnosis of Pervasive Development Disorder (PDD) on the Autism Spectrum.
Im not gonna lie-I liked the AS diagnosis much better that calling him Autistic. Im not biased to one or the other, but I just feel like there is less of an explanation needed for saying he has AS, versus my son is Autistic. Most peoples perception of an autistic child is very unrealistic, and not anything fitting to my child. And, as we all know-the spectrum is wide and personally in some ways-we all fit into it. But Im not a doctor, so Ill go with the rationale they used to remove a diagnosis from medical dictionaries and smush it all into one.
B-man attends weekly counseling sessions and weekly speech therapy session. He is extremely advanced in Math and Science-mainly because they are black and white and based on fact. He gets a little blurry on anything that is slightly "gray". we are currently working on helping him make friends at school, which is very challenging.
AJ, is now in kindergarten. He LOVES School, and school LOVES him. He is a mini-me, and known as quite the social butterfly at school. He is very devious, but smiles and tilts his head and all is forgotten. Its a very dangerous quality. With him growing up and now starting school we are now seeing what we missed out on with B-man. Things we thought were fairly normal for a Kindergartener or 1st grader-not so much.. Its like having a child in school has a whole new meaning for me.
I spend a lot of time feeling guilty that B-man is missing out on such fun childhood things, but then realize that he is enjoying childhood in his own way and loving every minute of it.
Keeping both kids happy and content in their own worlds is very tiresome, but since thats all I know, I will keep at it.
Until next time..
Friday, February 22, 2013
Fresh Start
Ahh... Here we go again. I am going to make a very honest effort to try and keep up with this. I know in my head, I want to, I want to have something to be able to go back and remember all the random moments in my life that have gotten me to the place I am at. I want my children to have something to reference for all those times when they dont quite believe that something actually took place. I envy other bloggers who can make the commitment to blog regularly and have all sorts of followers because people are interested in their life, although from a far and completely anonymous. I admittedly follow at least 4 blogs regularly and read them each morning like I am reading the local newpaper-why not take an extra 5 minutes at least and blog about the day prior?
I remind myself of these things regularly, and ask myself these questions constantly.
I want to do this. I clearly have an issue commiting myself to something, so I am about to vow to put my best foot forward and take this on-again.
Just to ensure I have a couple of days worth of material, I will end here for today, and tomorrow will be able to start playing catch up-yet again.
And so it begins... the fresh start to my blog about me and my boys and our WILD FAMILY moments!!
I remind myself of these things regularly, and ask myself these questions constantly.
I want to do this. I clearly have an issue commiting myself to something, so I am about to vow to put my best foot forward and take this on-again.
Just to ensure I have a couple of days worth of material, I will end here for today, and tomorrow will be able to start playing catch up-yet again.
And so it begins... the fresh start to my blog about me and my boys and our WILD FAMILY moments!!
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